War on Christmas 2015: Full communism at Starbucks

Halloween candy is still on sale at K-Mart and we’ve already got our first of what I’m sure will be many hard-fought battles in this year’s War on Christmas. And conservatives have chosen Starbucks as their first battlefield.

Breitbart London (Breitbart has a London bureau?) is very much aggrieved at the fact that the American coffee empire has succumbed to the whims of the secular-progressive-commie axis and decided to un-Christmafy their to-go coffee cups over the years:

Have a look at what Starbucks Red Cups over the years looked like: 

2009To the right is the 2009 offering. You can see distinct elements of Christmas, even if that means Christmas in a modern sense.

They lean heavily on stars (you know, like in the Nativity Story) and the background resembles the branches of a Christmas tree. All in all, a pretty good and acceptable design for something that self-defines as a Christmas-orientated product.

But 2009 was a long time ago, and since then the company has slowly, but definitely, moved away from Christmas, and Christian iconography.

2010To the left here, you’ll see the 2010 offering. Snowy, seasonal, at least it resembles something mildly festive and Western.

The same applies to the 2011 red cups, which have a dog sledging down a hill on the back of a snowman, snowflakes falling around them. It’s cute, really.

They stuck with snowmen for 2012, with a big one winking at you with a star in the background that year, and a sort of upmarket stars and baubles motif on their 2013 cups.2014

And then it all went south. Or east, maybe.

2014’s cups looked like a child scrawled on them with a marker pen. And not in a cute way. It was a distinct shift away from looking “Christmassy” (see right) before the monstrosity they’ve released this year (below).

And behold, Starbucks did conceive and bear a red cup, and called his name blasphemy:


Yep, Starbucks has gone full communism.

I’m not going to add anything here. I just cannot. wait. for two more months of this garbage.

Jon Green graduated from Kenyon College with a B.A. in Political Science and high honors in Political Cognition. He worked as a field organizer for Congressman Tom Perriello in 2010 and a Regional Field Director for President Obama's re-election campaign in 2012. Jon writes on a number of topics, but pays especially close attention to elections, religion and political cognition. Follow him on Twitter at @_Jon_Green, and on Google+. .

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64 Responses to “War on Christmas 2015: Full communism at Starbucks”

  1. Thanks for sharing!

  2. redflagged says:

    I suppose one could draw their own snowman on the cup if they felt so inclined? With a nice sliver marker. Someone childish enough to feel offended probably has one of those silver markers.

  3. DoverBill says:

    I understand that these things can be reused for grain storage?

  4. Wunderbar!

  5. I’m banned here, Dennis? Why is that? Who is Bobby Tolberto?

  6. Who is Bobby Tolberto?

  7. Unclechuck49 says:

    You do, you replied to him.

  8. Hello, do,you really think being deprived of DB is BFD?

    You’re the conservstibe weaselly jackal, pretending to be above all that while you call me Aqualung and others you don’t like.

    But thanks for demonstrating what you’re all about. I don’t even comment here anymore, so if I get banned here, BFD. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6ac49a5b39f4ddcc54f89a2a2946b29fa94d8b69dc81e5432b08536169e1bfd7.jpg

  9. Chutney Bridge says:

    I love Starbucks. What an awesome concept. Order coffee, sit and relax and drink the best tasting coffee in my great country the United States of America! God Bless you all and THANK you JESUS CHRIST.

  10. Chutney Bridge says:

    it’s like voting for Billary, right? Oh Dear!

  11. Chutney Bridge says:

    agree. Merry Christmas are the 2 best words in the English vernacular. Cuffy is an arsehole

  12. Chutney Bridge says:

    Merry Christmas Franky Poo. From a Christian to a classless heathen. Go fook yourself

  13. Chutney Bridge says:

    and now you broke out the DA troll account? How fookin classic is that? You are a loser FrancEs. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAAa

  14. Dennis says:

    It’s just remarkable how many liberal blogs tell you to take a hike. That doesn’t usually happen to liberals. But you’re like a liberal troll who trolls liberal websites. An oddity of sorts. A rara avis, if you will.

  15. Chutney Bridge says:

    the internet stalker got banned. It must really hurt douche bag. How great is it that you got banned Stalker BOI?

  16. Who gives a rat’s ass what you think?

  17. Who cares about the DB and OW? Ollie is so 2009 today. And who hangs out at S,N! anymore? But your wife’s ass is marvelous.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/3b11519aaa23c1631bf70101b29971094243bacd0cca088875b6fd58760b2e1d.jpg 2009

  18. Dennis says:

    I buy their Special Reserve. The barrista always gives me a complimentary cup of clover method coffee, which is about $4, so the price of the beans is only about $12 or so after that. I grind them at home and brew them with Aeropress. Straight black, the only way to drink coffee. Just looking at those pics of Christmas drinks makes me want to gag. That’s not even coffee.

  19. Chutney Bridge says:

    Hey asshole. How’s it feel to be banned from your new favorite website. He doesn’t like Internet Stalkers, aka Get Chutney Love, LOL LOL LOL

  20. Dennis says:

    Doxxer DA, did you go and get yourself banned once again? How many is that, now? OW, DB, S,N!, FON,…….am I missing any? Did Amanda ban you for being a transphobe, or am I mistaken on that one?

  21. Chutney Bridge says:

    How creative you are. You fookin MORON. That picture of you on your shitty little blog is priceless. Showing off those nearly 5 Chins you have.

  22. Chutney Bridge says:

    Hey Franky- How’s Taco Bell doing? She still douching?

  23. And here you are, wanting to engage me. What’s going on at the Duncan donuts bucket shop these days?

  24. Pennis Stalking Man
    Pennis Stalking Man
    They’ve given you a number
    And taken away your name.

  25. Chutney Bridge says:

    Show them that picture from your popular blog. You know the one of you with glasses on and your almost 5 Chins? It is followed by so many people you know. How many comments have you had? 5 in total, you fookin loser

  26. Chutney Bridge says:

    You are such an arsehole Franky Poo. You have no originality in your life You are a loser an unemployed 50 something year old who claims to have a ‘healthy’ relationship with Fat Slob AM

  27. Sure, bubba.

  28. From your wife Rebecca after I took her in tha ass.

  29. Chutney Bridge says:

    Where did you copy and pste that from, you moron? Google? Copypasta!!!

  30. Chutney Bridge says:

    Why dont you tell everyone 4 Chin?

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  32. Get Chut says:

    Shepherds wouldn’t be with their flocks during the cold winter in that region of the world.

    One theory is that the audience it was intended for knew that it meant the birth took place during the Spring of the year, which is when the shepherds would be out in the fields with their flocks, as the ewes would be giving birth then.

  33. Get Chut says:

    I’ve heard of a case where some became so hooked on caffeine that they had to have it several times a day. We’re talking about a habit so strong that they would wake up in the middle of the night and have a cup of coffee like you or I might have a hot milk or hot chocolate drink to help you fall asleep.

  34. BeccaM says:

    I don’t like their coffee much either. In fact, none of it really compares to the stuff I brew for myself at home.

  35. BeccaM says:

    Son Zorba has pretty much found out the same thing. He does get a
    migraine “aura” (a visual aura), and if he takes some caffeine quickly,
    he can usually either head off the migraine, or it is not nearly as bad.
    However, if he wakes up with a migraine (which, fortunately, is rare), coffee doesn’t help, and he’s pretty much screwed.

    Almost EXACTLY my situation. Likewise with regular — but modest — coffee intake reducing the frequency of the migraines. I can’t say exactly-exactly because when waking up with a migraine, the coffee (assuming I can drink it without barfing) does help a little bit. And although I occasionally get visual auras, more often my early stages manifest as extreme sound sensitivity.

  36. Zorba says:

    Starbucks coffee just tastes burnt to me. I think they over-crank their beans when they are roasting them.

  37. Zorba says:

    Yes, Son Zorba has pretty much found out the same thing. He does get a migraine “aura” (a visual aura), and if he takes some caffeine quickly, he can usually either head off the migraine, or it is not nearly as bad.
    However, if he wakes up with a migraine (which, fortunately, is rare), coffee doesn’t help, and he’s pretty much screwed.
    And he has found that daily coffee does very much reduce the frequency of his migraines.
    (BTW, although I don’t get migraines, I have found that red wine gives me a headache. Which is a damned shame, because there are a lot of really nice red wines out there, and I can never have more than a sip, just to taste it.)

  38. emjayay says:

    After a long office coffee habit I quit. Then I had a headache. I didn’t even know that was something that usually happens until I mentioned it to a coworker who said of course you do.

    But as probably everyone else knows, one thing that caffeine is supposed to do is constrict small blood vessels, which all have little bitty muscles that control the flow. You do adapt, like with any drug dependency, so when you quit the opposite happens. Expanded blood vessels all over your brain make for a headache.

    This doesn’t necessarily relate to migraines, although there is some relationship I think.

  39. loxe says:

    War on Christmas? Get serious, it’s a company not a charity. Let them do what they want.

    Speaking of the “war”…As with years past, there is only one war on Christmas and the Christians are doing it, and have been doing it for centuries. RIP all ancient holidays that used to share the dates near the shortest day of the year (Solstice).

  40. nicho says:

    Any serious (and honest) student of the bible knows that the birth and death narratives are complete fiction — even if you believe in the Jesus myth that comes in between.

  41. BeccaM says:

    Hell, the Bible gives no indication whatsoever that Jesus’ birth coincides with the mid-Winter solstice.

  42. BeccaM says:

    Yes, the meditation techniques I learned at the ashram help a great deal, as does a general change in life-attitude such that I have somewhat more equanimity — and also know how/when I have to step away from stressful situations. You’re right: Stress is itself a big trigger for me.

  43. rwlorenz says:

    So Starbucks is making a cost-related business decision instead of placating the Fundies on their religious fantasies? Where are their priorities?

  44. rwlorenz says:

    I don’t know all of these details on Christmas. Where in the Bible story is the mention of tinsel, red and green decorations, and Santa Claus?

  45. mf_roe says:

    Thanks for sharing, you have my sympathy, migraines should really be understood as life altering conditions which while treatable for most sufferers remain incurable. My daughter shares your sensitivity to cigarette smoke. While she avoids the coffee she often indulges hot chocolates which makes the caffeine link kind of cloudy. Stress is a big trigger, did your experience at the ashram have a positive effect?

  46. Indigo says:

    Red and green. That’s plenty Christmasy.

  47. Indigo says:

    Ditto that.

  48. BeccaM says:

    Sometimes it does. Back in the 1990s, as I was unknowingly creating a ‘pre-existing condition’ diagnosis which would later cause me to receive insurance denials, I worked for most of a year with my doctor to get a handle on the chronic migraines. She had me keep a daily journal to see if we could figure out the triggers and so on, and we’d meet about once a month to go over it and decide what to try next.

    We did try having me going off caffeine entirely. Turns out I’m one of those sorts where a controlled daily dose is beneficial and it’s not a trigger at all. (Controlled trial: I had significantly more headaches and migraines when off caffeine than when on it. This wasn’t withdrawal either; we had me abstaining from coffee and all other caffeine sources for three straight months.) However, I did react to red wines and ‘smoked’ foods (cheeses and meats), so I avoid those. Cigarette smoke and heavy musky perfumes, also triggers.

    Anyway, we came up with a strategy that, if I feel a headache coming on, can include a quick cup of coffee if I have the intuition it will help. Plus my doc flat out said I should go ahead and have that morning coffee, but not to excess. Basically, I have one 16oz mug each morning and that’s it, except rarely.

    No, caffeine doesn’t really help once the migraine has fully formed, but for me it can keep the early symptoms and headachy warning signs from developing further. Plus personally I’d much rather just enjoy a tasty cup of fresh-brew than pop an Imitrex (which as often as not doesn’t work).

    Everybody is different though, thus it totally makes sense for each person to figure out what their triggers are.

  49. mf_roe says:

    If you were a smoker you would have the same experience if you changed you nicotine intake. I believe headache is widely accepted as one of the side effects of any withdrawal from any addiction. Notice how cranky the Goppers get when they miss one of Rush’s tirades.

  50. nicho says:

    I’m not a headache person, but I will get one if I am caffeine deprived. I had to go two days without coffee a few weeks ago due to medical tests and I was ready to commit unspeakable acts by the end of the procedure. Fortunately, the friend who had driven me went directly from the surgical center to a Starbucks drive-through. It was like the Snickers ad. As soon as the coffee kicked in, I became a different person. I don’t remember what the cup looked like.

  51. mf_roe says:

    That is interesting, my middle daughter suffers migraines and for her caffeine is a Trigger. I recall that caffeine is often added to headache remedies used for “normal” headache but haven’t really seen it recommended as a prophylactic for migraines. Does caffeine help once the Migraine fully develops?

  52. BeccaM says:

    Better still, about 99% of the time, my daily coffee intake consists of home-brewed via a pour-through Melita style cone filter. The SB coffee is only for emergencies and I think the last two times I bought it there, it was only because there’s a kiosk in our grocery store and I felt a headache coming on.

  53. BeccaM says:

    Personally, I think it borders on blasphemy to express outrage that a commercial business isn’t including tangentially-related religious iconography on their products at certain arbitrary times of the year.

    My coffee habits are the same as yours: I have one large serving in the morning, basically the equivalent of two cups but in a large mug. The only time I ever have more is when I’m out and about and I feel a headache coming on, because a quick dose of caffeine is one of the way I can sometimes keep that headache from becoming a migraine.

  54. mf_roe says:

    Try McDonald’s, for mass produced coffee it scores a better value than StealBucks and is more widely available than most other outlets. Better yet, get to know the local Italian restaurant family, for most of them coffee is a sacrament.

  55. nicho says:

    I don’t hate Starbucks. I don’t love them. They serve a purpose. I buy coffee from indie shops when I need to buy coffee outside the house. Failing that, I go to whatever is closest. I have two cups of coffee in the morning — and that’s it. I’m really after the caffeine. I don’t care what it’s wrapped in. I would drink it out of a skull — your skull, in fact — if I had to. By the time the caffeine finally kicks in and awareness sets in, the container is long forgotten. To turn the container into some kind of a cultural-religious-political icon just shows that we are edging closer and closer to an idiocracy — and are already much closer than we like to think.

  56. MoonDragon says:

    Not being an aficianada of coffee-flavored sugary children’s drinks and as a loather of overheated burnt bean juice, I haven’t bought anything at SB since waiting for an early morning flight at the PBI airport. (The pastry was lousy, too,) so I don’t have a canine in this kerfuffle. If the practices of a mediocre hot drink purveyor are of vital importance to one’s enjoyment of Christmas, a rethinking of one’s spiritual fundamentals is needed. And one’s taste in coffee. I did pee in a Starbucks in Toronto (in the restroom in the proper receptacle.)

  57. BeccaM says:

    Plus yeah, sure, there’s always been a plethora of snow and northern European pine trees in the Middle East. Right.

    I have to wonder if they’re even aware of just how much western Christmas iconography was stolen directly from Pagan, Celtic and Norse practices.

  58. Sally says:

    I thought it looked like the angel who appeared to the shepherds. You know, Breitfart, Gabriel was it? And there is a star, and it’s Jesus’ favorite birthday colors, red and green. Geez..you want a nativity on a coffee cup? How religious.
    By the way, Jesus was most likely born in March or April, not December. The Pope co-opted a heathen winter holiday for Jesus’ birth. Just saying….

  59. BeccaM says:

    Hang on, I thought the fundies HATED Starbucks because it uses a Satanic/pornographic double-tailed mermaid as its unholy symbol of eeeeeeeeeevil?

    Me, I just think they have shitty coffee (although I have been witnessed every now and then with a Starbucks cup clutched in my mitt because I was desperate for a caffeine fix…)

  60. Pollos Hermanos says:

    Like I said at Breitbart. More than likely the Starbucks corporation realized it was cheaper to print up a basic red cup instead of a pattern and idiots like Breitbarters are now going to nail themselves on their crosses over it.

  61. kartski says:

    Yes Fox and Co., tell the Real American Merchants they can only sell Christmas Presents. They are to turn down sales of Presents and Food for Hanukkah Celebrations or any other Winter Solstices Celebrations. Real Americans do not want to profit from Heathens.

  62. Bcre8ve says:

    I was just in SB a few minutes ago. I’m guessing Britbart missed the part about how “Red is the first step. Guess what comes next?” that the rest of us saw while standing in line.

    Not they could ever be confused with someone holding an informed opinion or anything…

  63. Glen Thompson says:

    People still go to Starbucks? Oh dear!

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