God’s call for Scott Walker to run for president must have been a prank

This week, Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker dropped out of the Republican presidential nomination contest, becoming just the second major contender (after Rick Perry) to quit the race.

Walker’s exit was especially surprising. At one point, the Wisconsin governor had been considered a top-tier candidate, and had seemingly locked the Iowa caucuses (his neighboring state) as late as August. But Walker’s campaign plunged in recent weeks. His most recent polling showed that he garnered less than one-half percent among Republicans. What’s more, his money was drying up, with vendors reportedly worried that hundreds of thousands of dollars in billed services were going to go unpaid.

Scott Walker, via Wikimedia Commons

Scott Walker, via Wikimedia Commons

So what went wrong? Walker, after all, had the most important supporter of all. When he announced earlier this year his intentions to run, he had stated that he had been called by God to do so.

“I needed to be certain that running was God’s calling,” Walker wrote in a letter to supporters in July. “I am certain: this is God’s plan for me, and I am humbled to be a candidate for President of the United States.”

God must have a funny sense of humor. Rather than calling to see if his refrigerator was running, he called on Walker to run a doomed campaign instead.

Pundits will question and debate for a few days why Scott Walker’s presidential ambitions were a failure. Perhaps he wasn’t as savvy with the media as some had suggested, or maybe his inability to stick to one position on several policy issues had something to do with it. Or maybe he just got out-Trumped.

Whatever the case, we can be certain that God did not in fact call on Walker to be president. Whoever told him to run, it wasn’t the Big Man Upstairs. More likely, it was Walker’s own ego, posing as God’s voice.

Insanity is defined as doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results. Walker once claimed that he had God’s blessing before — and he had failed then to win as well.

In 2006 Walker ran for governor of Wisconsin. He had a very competitive primary challenge ahead of him: U.S. Congressman Mark Green, a Republican from the Green Bay area, had also decided to run. But Walker had one thing on his side that Green hadn’t counted on: God.

Unfortunately for Walker, Green had something too: donors. Walker bowed out of the governor’s race, biding his time until 2010 when he ran a successful campaign, without any major competitors.

In 2006, he believed he was called by God to run. But after he dropped out, it was also God who told him it was the right thing to do: “I believe that it was God’s will for me to run,” he said. “After a great deal of prayer during the last week, it is clear that it is God’s will for me to step out of the race.”

So it goes again in 2015. Walker had God on his side, but after it became clear that donations and support was dwindling, God told Scott Walker to shut down his campaign for good. Because, as we all know, God can move mountains, but he can’t move billionaires to support a losing horse.

Of course, there’s always the more rational way of looking at this: no candidate, no matter how much they believe it, is actually having a conversation with God about the presidency. They may talk to him all they want, but it’s doubtful that he’s saying anything back.

The difference between Walker and other candidates talking to God is that he’ll have a lot more time to talk now that he’s out of the race.


Chris Walker has been a political writer for more than ten years, contributing freelance opinion pieces to several online publications as well as managing his own blog, Political Heat, for more than six years. With a B.A. in Political Science and Journalism, Chris tries to bring a unique angle to every article he produces, including Millennial perspectives on the issues he's covering. Chris resides in Madison, Wisconsin, and proudly owns both a cheesehead and stock in the Green Bay Packers.

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37 Responses to “God’s call for Scott Walker to run for president must have been a prank”

  1. Number Six says:

    More than the Conservatives’ idea of God allows, at any rate!

  2. DoverBill says:

    Does this mean that I now stand a chance at a game of checkers against the baby Jesus?

  3. The_Fixer says:

    Sure! Just let me finish rage-biting my couch here…

  4. LanceThruster says:

    FISHED IN!!

  5. intlet9949 says:

    This reminds me of a Pentecostal minister here in the south who said it was God’s will for him to run for county council.After filing he was disqualified because God didn’t inform him he was running in the wrong district.

  6. Bill_Perdue says:

    The rich contribute to both parties and own both parties.

  7. 2karmanot says:

    Oh yes!

  8. 2karmanot says:

    Dhammmmn Fixer, you need some popcorn. Come over to my house and I’ll make some! :-)

  9. Masrry Thomas says:

    what Jack answered I’m shocked that anyone ready to get paid $20684 in four weeks on the web……,,,,……After earning an average of 19952 Dollars monthly,I’m finally getting 97 Dollars an hour,just working 4-5 hours daily online.….. Weekly paycheck… Bonus opportunities…earn upto $16k to $19k /a month…Only a few hour required to understand and start working…….HERE I STARTED…look over here …vd.

    ➤➤http:/ / Newsletter/NewFaceb00k/J0bOffer/$97h0urly…….★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

  10. Masrry Thomas says:

    what Jack answered I’m shocked that anyone ready to get paid $20684 in four weeks on the web…..,,,,,…….After earning an average of 19952 Dollars monthly,I’m finally getting 97 Dollars an hour,just working 4-5 hours daily online.….. Weekly paycheck… Bonus opportunities…earn upto $16k to $19k /a month…Only a few hour required to understand and start working…….HERE I STARTED…look over here …vd.

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  11. nicho says:

    Don’t think for a minute that the Koch Brothers aren’t chipping in to HRH’s super pac, which is not, definitely not, no sir no way, coordinating with her campaign. No siree, Bob. Not coordinating. Nope.

  12. nicho says:

    OMG — why does god hate so many people. He spent the whole Old Testament smiting men, women, and children. If his chosen ones didn’t kill enough, he’d send them back to kill more — and then he would kill again. He was the first — and worst — mass murderer. No one has been able to rise to his level of murder and mayhem since. Truly disgusting being.

  13. olandp says:

    Wow! That was one of the most fiercely protected copyrights in history. I can remember Johnny Carson stopping the song because of having to pay royalties.

  14. olandp says:

    It was probably just a wrong number.

  15. Duke Woolworth says:

    You talk to god: holy
    God talks to you: crazy.

  16. Bill_Perdue says:

    I think it was the Koch brothers who called him, just like other corporatists are calling Democrats.

    Top donors to HRH HRC

    Citigroup Inc $782,327
    Goldman Sachs $711,490
    DLA Piper $628,030
    JPMorgan Chase & Co $620,919
    EMILY’s List $605,174
    Morgan Stanley $543,065
    Time Warner $411,296
    Skadden, Arps et al $406,640
    Lehman Brothers $362,853
    Cablevision Systems $336,288
    Kirkland & Ellis $311,441
    Squire Patton Boggs $310,596
    21st Century Fox $302,400
    National Amusements Inc $297,534
    Ernst & Young $297,142
    Merrill Lynch $292,303
    Credit Suisse Group $290,600
    Corning Inc $274,700
    Greenberg Traurig LLP $273,550

    “This table lists the top donors to this candidate in 1999-2016. The organizations themselves did not donate, rather the money came from the organizations’ PACs, their individual members or employees or owners, and those individuals’ immediate families.” h
    https://www.opensecrets.org/politicians/contrib.php?cycle=Career&cid=n00000019

    Both parties and all of their politicians are tools of the rich.

  17. goulo says:

    Hey, whenever religious claims make no logical sense, one just needs to remember:

    God works in mysterious ways! :)

  18. Annie c says:

    Maybe God wanted Dubya to save millions in Africa

  19. BeccaM says:

    In utterly unrelated news and a blow against copyright abuse, a federal judge has voided the ownership of the song ‘Happy Birthday’ by the Warner/Chappell Music, saying the rights to the lyrics had never been properly copyright-protected in the first place.

    The copyright itself was only for a very specific piano arrangement of the song (originally titled ‘Good Morning to You’) and covered none of the original or subsequent birthday-themed lyrics. Having been written in the late 1800s, the melody itself has LONG been in the public domain. So that leaves the lyrics. Well, ‘Good Morning to You’ is also in the public domain. So that leaves only the ‘Happy Birthday to You’ lyrics. Technically, you could dub-step a beat and rap the lyrics to a completely different tune…and Warner/Chappell would have sued your ass. Until today.

    The ruling itself makes for interesting reading for those like myself who are interested in copyright law.

    In short, the ruling was that Warner/Chappell can’t establish a chain of ownership on the copyright to the lyrics, nor can the existence of the specific lyrics copyright be established anywhere. Basically, people were singing the Happy Birthday version for decades before anybody thought to write them down and try to claim ownership (which they also screwed up in doing).

    Anyway, ruling text is here: http://www.shadesofgraylaw.com/media/00065570.pdf

  20. The_Fixer says:

    Oh, for F***’s sake, all of the religious nuts say that God wanted them to run, and if they get elected, God tells them what to do.

    It is an especially smelly pile of crap. It’s time to call bullshit on these lying crapsacks. Never let them say this kind of thing again without demanding a video of the whole conversation they had with their God.

    Any video would clearly show one A-Hole talking to himself.

  21. Lou Alexander says:

    I wonder if God blocked Caller ID when he made this prank call?

  22. RepubAnon says:

    God said “Hmmm – I need to get some of those mammon-worshipping billionaires to waste a bunch of their money. Hey, I’ll tell Scott Walker that I want him to run for President! He’s too egotistical to ask me whether I want him to do this successfully!”

  23. Brent Hull says:

    Must have been a butt dial.

  24. BeccaM says:

    Or hell, just a little consistency would be nice. Even though the Bible says nothing about civil marriage rights for gay and lesbian couples, God apparently instructed a dim-witted little bigot from Kentucky not to do her elected job as county clerk, but He then neglected to bring her up to date on what both He and His Son supposedly said — explicitly — on the subjects of adultery and divorce.

    Unless of course the dim-witted little bigot from Kentucky is just projecting her own prejudices and homophobia onto a (theoretically) supreme omnipotent and omniscient super-deity… And making up stories to justify her bigotry.

  25. Mike_in_the_Tundra says:

    There are medications for people who hear voices.

  26. Indigo says:

    It seems reasonable to ask to see a selfie with the deity or some kind of validation, maybe an autographed copy of His book, or a recording of His instructions. Or the napkin He wrote His notes on. A responsible person, one considering a public office, would have a record of a meeting that important. Unless they just made up a story.

  27. woodroad34 says:

    How goes Wisconsin, goes the rest of the country? Computer says no. The rest of the country likes their jobs and benefits and barely-there middle class existence. Scott Walker is a myopic fish in a muddy pond. Donald Trump should have addressed his comment about Carly Fiorina to Scott Walker (maybe even Ted Cruz). He (and Ted) both have this weird droopy eye and dopey something-stinks here-I-hope-it’s-not-me look about them.

  28. MerryMarjie says:

    If I’m not mistaken, George W. Bush also claimed God told him to run and made him President. Now why do you suppose God would hate so many people? That would be the ones Bush killed with his senseless, “pre-emptive” strike war. And does God hate America? Because that’s what happened to us all over the world when Dubya got in office, playing a Texas cowboy, shootin’ first and askin’ questions later, until the rest of the world decided we were not worth spit.

    God’s made some pretty bad choices lately, hasn’t he. Oh, wait, don’t the Christian evangelicals say that God chooses our Presidents? Uh, — Barack Obama, too? What? Why, that can’t be true, could it. Why would he put a Muslim, Community Organizing Socialist in office? If you ask me, God had better step down from this all-seeing, all-knowing position he’s had for years, because he’s going to get gobsmacked when a WOMAN occupies the highest office in America.

  29. Kelly R Burnett says:

    This is one stupid mofo, crossedeyed dik, I despise this useless little blowhard, bye bye……………way to play the God card to pathetic tool.

  30. MoonDragon says:

    I like to think that somewhere in the afterlife, doG and Jock Yablonski are sipping a small barrel bourbon shot with a beer chaser and chortling over the hubris of a man who hates unions campaigning on a “Proudly made by American union workers” motorcycle and yelling “Gotcha, punk!”

  31. BeccaM says:

    Y’know, the next time a fundamentalist politician claims God told him or her to run (or to drop out), I think we need to call bullshit on it. Loudly. “Show us proof your claims aren’t just your pride, hubris and ego.”

    They can’t provide proof because if it really was God, the message would be more like, “Stop pestering me like a greedy child before Christmas. I’m God, not Santa Fucking Claus.”

    In any case, as I’ve remarked about Walker, it’s not that he decided to drop out or that God told him to. There is no doubt whatsoever that a couple guys named David and Charles told him his campaign was done and Walker just shared this information with the rest of us.

  32. Naja pallida says:

    To be fair, his only God is money.

  33. Knottwhole says:

    No only does this so-called god kill children, he also has a sense of humor.

  34. Indigo says:

    Kokopelli, the Trickster God, has more darn fun with that Scott Walker than most gods allow.

  35. MoonDragon says:

    I guess Koch can give you that sudden rush, but it isn’t something that will carry you through in the long run.

  36. $100 says Cruz drops out next.

    But, then who will represent the Lollipop Guild?

    http://i.imgur.com/MsPyIGL.gif

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