What do you do when you find out your Instagram account is gay?
That’s the dilemma facing confirmed-bachelor and consummate world-traveler Aaron Schock. You wouldn’t know it from many of the social media posts, but in addition to incessantly visiting exotic locations around the world and meeting lots of cute young guys, Schock is also the “conservative” seriously-anti-gay Republican congressman from smalltown Peoria, Illinois.
To great fanfare, Schock’s Instragram account and Twitter feeds came out earlier this year in what, to many, was not a terribly great surprise.
Since the revelation, Schock’s Twitter feed went all “ex-gay,” not reporting an update since last November. Schock’s Instagram account, on the other hand, is definitely still a friend of Dorothy. Albeit, a more closeted one.
While one post is of Schock with a known gay man, the others are putatively “straight” pictures that just so happen to contain Schock with one or more awfully good-looking, usually dark-haired, young guys.
The next two photos are particularly artful. They’re about such benign topics as a pretty place setting, and the Vatican, except of course the photos “just happen” to contain really hot dark-haired young men. Yep, nothing gay about that.
But putting aside his Instagram account’s homophilia aside, Schock has another more serious problem: His obvious narcisissim.
Judging by his Instagram account, you might be undertandably confused to hear that Aaron Schock is the Congressman from Peoria, than the Representative from Rio. Schock is a world-class traveler who’s just as comfortable in over-$400-a-night digs at the Four Seasons in Jackson Hole, Wyoming as he is surfing at Waikiki Beach in Hawaii.
If these trips aren’t related to Schock’s job in Congress, then he must be awfully wealthy, and have an awfully easy constituency, if he has time to galavant around the world to this degree. And if this trips are “congressional delegations,” aka “codels,” meaning official trips that a bunch of members of Congress take together, and the taxpayer pays for, then why do we only ever see photos of Schock half-nude, or shopping, or visiting swank French pastry shops, or skiing (a lot), or hanging out with awfully-cute dark-haired young men?
He sure has an awful lot of free time and disposable income compared to most members of Congress.
Did I mention that our down-home congressman from Peoria hired a surfing coach while out in Hawaii, and then had a service photograph him while surfing, as part of the deal. It’s good to be king.
Schock has apparently never met a congressional delegation he didn’t like. The guy goes everywhere, and he posts photos of his voyages, a lot of them, and very few show him at work rather than play.
In just the last year, and really most of these are from the only the past few months, Aaron Schock have visited:
Skiing in Wasatch, Utah
Japan, for a rare “at-work” photo – though actually just a cool chance to fly in a helicopter
The last facet of Congressman Codel’s fabulous frolicks is his penchant for star-f*cking. We’ve already seen him with Apple’s Steve Cook, but here he is doing a group selfie, just like Ellen, at “the pit” from the Country Music Awards!
And here he is with famed English billionaire Richard Branson!
And here he is with stars from the Grammys!
And great seats at the Justin Timberlake concert (becuse what conservative heterosexual GOP congressman doesn’t gush over Justin Timberlake).
And Carrie Underwood!
Like all gay Instagram accounts, this one has a beard – his gun
Do read the description to the right, and the first comment.