Kremlin experts determine that Jewish autonomous flag is not gay

The Kremlin has tasked “flag experts” to investigate whether the flag of Russia’s Jewish Autonomous region is gay.

The Jewish flag contains the rainbow, and someone was apparently concerned that rainbows might now be illegal under Russia’s draconian new anti-gay “propaganda” law.

The rainbow, including rainbow flags, have been adopted as the symbol of the international gay civil rights movement.

Kremlin concludes that Jewish Autonomous flag is not gay.

Kremlin concludes that the Jewish Autonomous Oblast flag, above, is not a practicing homosexual.

Fortunately, as Miriam Elder of Buzzfeed reports, Kremlin flag experts (the “l” is apparently silent) have concluded that the Jewish region has nothing to fear.

There will be no flag-bashing today, as the flag is definitively not gay. (Though it might be curious when it drinks a lot.)

rainbow-flag-autonomous-jewish

A top Kremlin flag expert explains his ruling that the Jewish rainbow flag is not a homosexual.

Seriously.  This is what Russia spends it’s time doing.  Having experts analyze flags to make sure they’re not gay.  How, in any case, can you tell if a flag is gay?  See if it knows that the word “butcher” is both a noun and an adjective (well, a comparative at least)?

Things just get messier and messier as we approach the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi, Russia.  The Russian government’s clampdown on its gay and trans citizens, and its growing paranoia – as evidenced by flag-gate – only goes to show that concerns about hosting the Olympics in Russia were hardly unfounded.

If the Kremlin has to task experts to make an official determination as to whether a Jewish flag is gay, then what is Vladimir Putin going to do when a real gay flag is unfurled during the Sochi Olympics by a gay, or gay-friendly, athlete?

If the Russian Interior Ministry is to be believed, that athlete is going to be arrested.

If every day Russians don’t even know if their flag runs afoul of the law – and actively worry about it – how will Olympic athletes, from countries around the world, have any better idea about their own actions?


Follow me on Twitter: @aravosis | @americablog | @americabloggay | Facebook | Google+ | LinkedIn. John Aravosis is the editor of AMERICAblog, which he founded in 2004. He has a joint law degree (JD) and masters in Foreign Service from Georgetown (1989); and worked in the US Senate, World Bank, Children's Defense Fund, and as a stringer for the Economist. Frequent TV pundit: O'Reilly Factor, Hardball, World News Tonight, Nightline & Reliable Sources. Bio, .

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  • puasnt1996

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  • Vanessa E

    Better than enabling your lifestyle choice.

  • Vanessa E

    I support the right of the Russian people to protect their society from being degraded by the homosexual lifestyle choice. If the government had discouraged the homosexual lifestyle choice here there would be less confused perverts spreading propaganda such as the false “born that way theory”.

    Take the 7 steps to recruit proof your child today

    http://www.defendthefamily.com/pfrc/books/sevensteps/contents.html

    We must defend the family from the tragically confused perverts who claim that the homosexual lifestyle choice is “who you are”.

  • Mike_in_the_Tundra

    Actually Becca, I did pay attention in grammar classes which helped when I was teaching about grammar. Knowing that something is incorrect doesn’t mean that people don’t use it (such as ain’t). I have spent many, many years with gay men, and I have heard it more than a few times. Our church congregation had two Davids. When I asked my husband which one he was talking about. His answer was, “The butcher one.” He knew that I wouldn’t know the surnames, and that was the fastest way to describe them. Maybe I’ve sat in bars a lot more than you have, but I heard it used once, twice, or three …… hundred times.

    Women also use it. When my husband asked our daughter which one of us had the butcher walk, we didn’t have to explain that we weren’t asking which one walked around with a cleaver. I know that one of our female vicars had a similar discussion with her wife.

  • http://www.rebeccamorn.com/mind BeccaM

    ‘More butch’. Didn’t pay that much attention in English grammar classes, eh? ;-)

    I’m a bit of a stickler.

  • Loaded

    I don’t know…Putin looks totally gay to me. Thou doth protest too much?

  • Zeb Ryan

    I think it was a joke, right? That individual is butcher than this one.

  • Nathanael

    He also spent so much time trying to do alchemy that he had severe mercury poisoning.

  • emjayay

    In case you check out the link and are wondering what the article says, here’s what Google Translate thinks:
    The bishops in the Norwegian church here gathered outside the cathedral a few years
    ago, the Thursday issue a cohabitation ethical læreuttalelse.

    (Foto): Trygve W. Jordheim

    Both wings of the gay controversy pray for bishops

    The Association Prayer for the Norwegian Church and the Norwegian Student Christian
    Federation mobilizes the bishops

    Controversy over weddings for gays has triggered prayer at least two edges
    in connection with the Bishops’ Conference this week.

    Association Prayer for the Norwegian Church encourages people to pray specifically for the cohabitation ethical statement which is expected from the bishops in the morning. “The best thing would probably be a further delay,” according to the association’s website.

    READ MORE: The bishops are not agreed on homosexuality

    Also present Christian Student Association mobilizes: “This case affects many of us personally, or it touches someone we love in. This is about love,” according
    to the Facebook event that Wednesday morning had 92 participants.

    The prayers printed on the side to be printed and delivered to the bishops before tomorrow’s press conference.

    READ MORE: No to cohabit, even gays

    Learning Organization

    ■ After the introduction of the new gender -neutral marriage in 2008 asked the
    National Council of the Bishops’ Conference to launch “a thorough review
    of teologsk church marriage and cohabitation ethical understanding .”

    ■ Thursday 17 October bishops put forward his teachings statement about relationships . The
    greatest excitement attaches to the Episcopal meeting’s majority is in favor of
    the Norwegian Church should adopt liturgy for the making of same-sex marriage.

    ■ Any change in the Church’s liturgy must in turn be determined by the General
    Synod . Church Council prepares matters to the General Synod , in December will clarify how
    this matter may be presented to the General Synod in April 2014.

  • Paul

    Come to think of it, I have never seen a girl Leprechaun.

  • arcadesproject

    He was also reputed to be a great big jerk. He could hardly get along with anyone and was forever suing people. He was, however, the greatest scientific mind of his era, so there’s that.

  • arcadesproject

    So, the Kremlin also has control of lots of nuclear weapons? I don’t know whether to be pleased because they figured out that the flag is not gay or alarmed because they thought it might be.

  • http://adgitadiaries.com/ karmanot

    I saw a drag Leprechaun once, but twern’t little people.

  • Marco Luxe

    Although it won’t help with front end harassment, there is now an official Russian document to support a defense of charges of propaganda. From the Buzzfeed story, the Russian expert defines gay flags as a rainbow PLUS some other identifying insignias ["labels and images"]. In addition to the J.A.R. in Siberia, the city of Cuzco, Peru also has a rainbow as its official flag, along with the historical banner of the Inca Empire. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Flag_of_Cusco.svg I wonder if shouts of “Inca Pride” and flag waiving will baffle Russian officials when heard in Sochi.

  • http://AMERICAblog.com/ John Aravosis

    ooh

  • BillFromDover

    Not yet, but somebody has to make the shoes?

  • rerutled

    These should be handed out at the games by volunteers. Also, we should encourage the development of the Russian bureaucracy to adjudicate whether something “gay” or “not gay” — starting with the straight-protagonist version of Sondheim’s “Company”. Because, you know, someone might want to perform that in Russia.

  • http://www.rebeccamorn.com/mind BeccaM

    Well, Leprechauns are pretty gay.

    Ever see a girl Leprechaun? ;-)

  • http://www.rebeccamorn.com/mind BeccaM

    Re: Butcher — noun or verb, actually, in its base form. Only becomes an adjective with the modifier “-ed” in which case we can talk about the Russian government’s “butchered sense of decency, morality, and humanity.” For example. ;-)

    Anyway, it all goes to show just how over-the-top virulently hateful the anti-gay pogrom has become.

  • Indigo

    “Is is what it is . . . is it is what it is?” Thomas Pynchon in ‘Bleeding Edge.’

  • Monoceros Forth

    There is a small chance that Isaac Newton, who conducted a famous series of experiments in optical refraction, was gay. Nobody knows for sure. He never married and it’s been claimed indeed that he died a virgin, but he did have at least one very close male friendship.

  • OmeletTheDogOut

    Prisms are still gay, right?

  • LanceThruster

    Yes, but what does “Big Gay Al” think?

    Bombs are flying people are dying

    Children are crying politicians are lying too

    Cancer is killing, Texaco’s spilling

    The whole world’s gone to hell but how are you?

    I’m super, thanks for asking

    All things considered I couldn’t be better I must say

    I’m feeling super no, nothing bugs me

    Everything is super when you’re, don’t you think I look cute in this hat

    I’m so sorry Mr.Cripple

    But I just can’t feel too bad for you right now.

    Because I’m feeling so insanely super

    That even the fact that you can’t walk can’t bring me down

    He’s super thanks for asking

    All things considered, he couldn’t be better he must say

    I’m super no, nothing bugs me everything is super when you’re

    Don’t you think I look cute in this hat these little pants

    This matching tie that I got at Vogue

    I’m super in the barracks and the trenches as well

    Stick ‘em up Big Gay Al says do ask do tell

    Skittles yes he’s super and he’s proud to be gay okay

    Everything is super when you’re gay, when you’re gay

    Songwriters

    Marc Shaiman;Trey Parker

    Published by

    SONY/ATV HARMONY;WB MUSIC CORP.

  • BillFromDover

    I understand that they next plan to investigate pots of gold?

  • http://heimaey.us/ heimaey

    I wonder if they investigate man on man sex to see how gay that is and how gay is gay. Probably.

  • Indigo

    The Norwegian state church Lutheran bishops make a rainbow:

    http://www.vl.no/troogkirke/begge-floyer-i-homostriden-ber-for-bispemotet/

  • caphillprof

    Will they arrest an Olympian waving the Jewish Autonymous flag in Gay solidarity???

  • Indigo

    In other news, the international community is seriously preparing to enable, sponsor, and attend an aggressively homophobic event.

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