The Mayan Apocalypse and John Boehner’s own human sacrifices

So, the world did not end. Or at least nobody noticed if it did.

Of course, the Mayans didn’t really ‘predict’ the end of the world. The end of the long count merely marked the end of one epoch and the beginning of another, oh and a huge number of human sacrifices of course.

Interpreting “God’s” intent has always been a tricky business. The ancient Greeks were told that the Gods were offended by Socrates and his students. The Mayas and Incas were told that the celestial order could only function if lubricated by the blood of human sacrifices. And today we are told that a creator God who could imagine a universe of half a trillion galaxies is a bigot obsessed with gay sex.

According to Genesis, God created man in his own image. This gets the process back to front. Man has been busy creating gods in his own image from the start of history, and the gods man has created tell us more about the men and women who created them than of God.

We don’t know what ended the Mayan civilization, but what kept the Inca human sacrifice racket going was the fact that most of the victims came from other tribes that the Incas had conquered. Which meant that the Incas had made rather a lot of enemies when the Spanish conquistadors showed up.

human sacrifice

Human Sacrifice via Shutterstock

Boehner and his GOP allies are not demanding actual sacrifices of humans, in return for dismantling the sequestration they insisted on as their price for passing the last increase in the debt ceiling. But the measures that Boehner proposed in his ‘Plan B’ scenario would have required huge sacrifices from the poor, moderate sacrifices by the middle class and delivered a fat bonus for the richest of the super-richy-rich. Its the same old ‘end of the world as we know it’ scam, but with updated media packaging. And the purpose is still essentially the same: To allow the super-elite to lord over the rest of us, while demanding their own sacrifices from the humans beneath them.

Boehner’s plan collapsed as it became apparent that he does not have the votes to get his own Republican caucus to pass it. According to most of the pundits this is because Plan B is not right-wing enough.

I suspect the real reason is that it would be electoral poison in the 2014 general election and the members know it.  Rank and file GOP House members are in a no-win situation of their own making. If they vote for any bill that raises taxes on the super-richy-rich, plutocrats like top-Romney-supporter Sheldon Adelson are going to be dropping huge gobs of money on primary challengers who might well beat them. And if they vote for a bill that cuts Medicare or Social Security, they become vulnerable in the general election.

The GOP House members were bamboozled by Boehner and company when they passed the Ryan budget. It appears that at least some of them are learning. There is no agreement that Boehner can propose that is not electoral poison in 2014.

The best strategy for GOP House members is to refuse all deals and wait until January 1st, 2013 when the Bush tax cuts expire permanently. At that point, the roles of the GOP and Democrats will be reversed, and it will be the Democrats trying to get GOP support for a tax cut GOP constituents Adelson and Koch would rather see go to deficit reduction, but actual GOP voters will expect to see passed.

The Senate has already put a bill on the table that makes the Bush tax cuts for the middle class permanent, while allowing the rest to expire. Filibuster reform will allow the Senate to do the same with a bill to cancel the sequestration ‘austerity bomb’. With that bill in place, it is hard to see how the GOP explains to the voters that they are not responsible for the layoff notice they are getting from Boeing and Raytheon, or for the military bases being closed in the vulnerable GOP districts. The sequestration act specifies how much Obama must cut from each account, but not the order in which the cutbacks occur.

Unless Obama blinks for real, the GOP is going to walk away from the crisis they created empty-handed. But don’t imagine this was a futile exercise for them. Even though they will get nothing from the crisis, they have proved that they are so important that they could create the crisis in the first place. Like the Mayan priests and their modern day equivalents they can go back to their favorite pastime of being admired while laying waste to others.

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  • jaycubed

    It is not known whether it was the winners or the losers of the Mayan sacred ball game were sacrificed. Since the ball game represented the act of Creation and the sacrifices represented the creator Gods and became Gods themselves following their sacrifice, it is quite possible that it was the winners who were sacrificed. There are vague contemporary written references that support this view and nothing that supports the idea that the losers were sacrificed. My personal opinion is that it was the winners who died & became gods. It seems unthinkable to us, but consider the Mayan pyramids, some of which had sacrificial altars at the top of incredibly steep staircases. It would be difficult to get an unwilling victim to the altar. Not so hard if they Believe they will transcend life & become a God.

  • jaycubed

    If nothing else, for the huge number of the victims involved.

  • MyrddinWilt

    OK, I get it, next time I compare John Boehner to anyone I’ll choose Aztec heart ripper priest as it seems Inca child murderer or Mayan limb tearer is clearly insufficient.

  • MyrddinWilt

    The Maya seem to have had the Boehner approach to human sacrifice. The rich prick their finger, lose a little blood and are praised for it. Some poor schlub at the other end of the scale is ripped in two and this passes without mention.

    The hieroglyphs indicate a rather more robust practice of human sacrifice than you suggest. Though whether it was strictly ‘religious’ or just an excuse for some sadistic fun torturing prisoners of war to death is debatable.

  • olandp

    But for the Maya the ritual blood letting of the royals was the most important, it assured rains and a good crop.

    The Flower Wars were the Aztecs.

  • http://adgitadiaries.com/ karmanot

    Republicans: For harming the poor, implement starvation programs, kill education, prevent health programs, harm the elderly, plunder the world, subjugate women. Did someone say Anti-Christ?

  • benb

    Just to let y’all know…the City of West Hollywood is celebrating the End of the World:

    http://www.weho.org/

  • MyrddinWilt

    The practice of human sacrifice was pretty much common to all the central and south american civilizations at one point or other.

    In the case of the Maya they did the ball game thing where the losing side was sacrificed to the gods. Nobody knows the full extent of what they got up to as the civilization collapsed a thousand years before Cortez arrived. It does seem that the human sacrifices played a part, there was a sudden escalation in the warfare from symbolic battles where the objective was to take prisoners to sacrifice to no holds barred attacks on each other’s cities.

    The Aztecs might be an outlier in the scale of the sacrifices. But the Mayans and Incans were certainly well into it. The Inca slaughtered several thousand for the death of a king.

  • Kenneth C. Fingeret

    Hello karmanot,

    No Viagra for the deflated Boner (sic((k)) MF)!

  • jaycubed

    The Aztecs sacrificed humans by cutting out the hearts of conscious victims on a daily basis (to keep the various Gods happy) and their victims numbered in the hundreds of thousands to millions. There were pyramids of skulls left as monuments and public buildings were built on a foundation of the bones of victims. They also sacrificed huge numbers of children (perhaps 20% of the population?) and tortured those who weren’t already ill or maimed so that their tears would fertilize the Earth. The Aztec Priests who performed the sacrifices appeared to have black skin because it was considered unholy to wash off the dried blood of sacrificial victims.

    The total number of Inca child victims were more likely to have been in the dozens, and they were done to celebrate special events with pampered victims drugged before their deaths.

    Aztec human/child sacrifice was the primary holy ritual of the Aztec Religion and the primary purpose of the Aztec state & military. Inca child sacrifice was a minor component of their culture.

    Little wonder the Aztecs quickly adopted the Roman Catholic death cult of their conquerors, with its ritual cannibalism and the worship of death, blood & torture.

  • Sweetie

    “The Mayan Apocalypse meets the Corporate Party Apocalypse: Mayan priests wanted human hearts, both parties want your Medicare.”

    fify

  • Sweetie

    The Inca sent children to freeze at high elevations. The Aztecs were the heart rippers.

  • http://adgitadiaries.com/ karmanot

    Boehner: Loser

  • olandp

    You don’t mean the Inca, it was the Aztecs that made human sacrifice, the heart of a warrior taken in battle, that kept the universe in order. The Maya rulers made sacrifice by bloodletting from their tongues and genitals, some human sacrifice, but the most important was the blood from their leaders. It was the Aztec who dominated Mexico at the time the conquistadors landed and invaded. The Aztecs were hated by the peoples that they conquered in the eternal quest for brave soldiers for sacrifice. Pre-Columbian America was a beautiful but very brutal place.

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