Eleveld on marriage and Mehlman

Kerry Eleveld in the Advocate:

I fully understand that Mehlman’s revelation this week picked the scab off a wound that runs deep throughout the LGBT community, and I’m not absolving anyone of anything. But nor do I think it’s my place to stand in judgment.

Every morning newsprint slaps my coffee table with a mountain of injustice that often rims my eyes with sadness and occasionally rushes my heart with rage. And I would much rather train my sights on creating a future of fairness than stay mired in yesterday’s despair.

So instead of crucifying Mehlman, let’s hand him a pickax and a shovel and let him get to work on dismantling the hate he and his cronies helped heap upon a vulnerable and undeserving minority.

And who knows, maybe even President Obama and his advisers will get a whiff of the fact that spring is on its way.

Follow me on Twitter: @aravosis | @americablog | @americabloggay | Facebook | Instagram | Google+ | LinkedIn. John Aravosis is the Executive Editor of AMERICAblog, which he founded in 2004. He has a joint law degree (JD) and masters in Foreign Service from Georgetown; and has worked in the US Senate, World Bank, Children's Defense Fund, the United Nations Development Programme, and as a stringer for the Economist. He is a frequent TV pundit, having appeared on the O'Reilly Factor, Hardball, World News Tonight, Nightline, AM Joy & Reliable Sources, among others. John lives in Washington, DC. .

Share This Post

  • wmforr

    “the greatest anti-gay force in the world right now.”

    No. That would by the Catholic Church.

  • Likewise I’m a longtime fan of your incisive wit, madame.


  • Just an elbow

    Oh yeah, been there.

  • Just an elbow

    The last person on this sight that used the “gays and muslim haters have similar goals” line got my foot so far up his bei=hind I’m still picking peanuts from between my toes.
    It was a stupid and repulsive argument then, and it’s still stupid and repulsive.

  • Just an elbow

    crustybastard, you certainly have a way of cutting through the marshmallow fluff and whipped cream to the steaming turd beneath,
    I applaud you, sir!

  • Just an elbow

    The only ray of light I glean from this is that Republican rats are abandoning the sinking ship of homophobia as a viable political tool.
    But that doesn’t turn the rats into housepets…

  • Christians kicked the Christianity out of me.

    Well said, and likewise.

  • Joehio

    Michael, thanks for the information. I had not been following the DADT repeal details as closely as you. That’s good to know.

    The reason I praised Eleveld is because for the last year and a half, she seems to have reported problems on Capitol Hill way ahead of everybody else. When HRC and other news sources and even Barney Frank were giving rosy schedules for when legislation would be passed, several times Eleveld seemed to know that the legislation was heading before any one else did. At least before anyone else that I read.

  • Ninong

    I have no use for Ken Mehlman. He can do his own thing as far as I’m concerned. I can’t stand the SOB and I’m actually sorry that he finally admitted he’s gay. Now he will be able to move someone into his lovely $3.77 million Chelsea condo. Next thing you know, Mehlman will be pushing for New York to legalize gay marriage so that he can get married.

    I wish he had stayed miserable in his closet for the rest of his life. The same goes for Karl Rove.

  • Michael @ LeonardMatlovich.com

    “Investigative reporter“???? “Kerry Eleveld has been doing a fantastic job”????????? The ONLY way anyone could honestly believe that is if they’re guilty of letting her be their ONE source of information. For those of us who actually read a variety of sources, Eleveld is a hack who time and again fails to adequately do her homework before she starts typing, often fails to uncover crucial points related to it, or just plain fucks up facts.

    I’d never paid much attention to her until I caught her letting Candidate Obama lie to her readers, bragging that HE had been “a chief cosponsor of and then passed” Illinois gay rights law which was a conscious, shameless lie. In fact, unlike previous versions of the bill, he’d been too busy running for US Senate to even add his name to SB3186, and could not have “passed” it because he was no longer even in the Illinois Senate when it was voted on, having resigned to move to Washington.

    I wrote her, hoping it had been an innocent error, but she replied, “What Sen. Obama said is a simplification of all that transpired but his essential premise is true” because he had been a cosponsor of such bills in earlier sessions of the state senate and ONE source praised him for lobbying for them. By Eleveld’s standards, Michael Jordan should get credit for every winning game the Chicago Bulls have played since he retired.

    THIS YEAR, she wrote that the now-dead-thanks-to-Obama’s-betrayal Military Readiness Enhancement Act [MREA] only allowed three months for “implementation” of ending the ban when it actually would have allowed SIX months. That’s not just being 50% wrong but was 100% CRITICAL to report on because this was in the middle of the successful scam SECDEF Gates was running claiming that Congress was creating a crisis by wanting to vote on repeal before “the study” was over, implying that the sky would fall when he was forced to end discharges immediately.

    The fact is that not only would the MREA’s timeline allowed the DoD not just six months to work out ending discharges, but, thereby, TWO MONTHS MORE than ANY OTHER of the 25 countries that have lifted their bans took…AND, given the normal amount of time it takes for DEFAUTH to work its way back and forth through Congress before getting to the President’s desk, Gates was yelling about a problem that didn’t exist. By the time it was passed and signed, the end of those six months would have been months PAST the promised end of “the study”—December 1st. So, MAYBE if Eleveld had cared enough to get the facts MAYBE she could have written an article titled: “Why Is Secretary Gates Crying Wolf?” and he wouldn’t have totally gotten away with his con.

    Likewise she kept wondering whether Obama thinks DADT is “constitutional” months after he’d made clear he did in an interview with Anderson Cooper, and much of her “reporting” on the ODOJ’s defense of DADT has been irresponsibly under-informed.

    More recently she opined: “I don’t believe Defense Department leadership is being intrinsically mischievous” with the way “the study” was conceived and being executed with its gay panic inducing questions. “Mischievous”????? Who knew that decisions about the lives of gay servicemen and women were on a par with naughty kittens who’ve lost their mittens?

    That attitude is consistent with her frequent Pollyanna passes she’s given both Obama personally…totally failing to adequately report on his forcing our allies in Congress to tear up and throw away the MREA thus creating the BP oil spill of ban legislation…and the Obama Nostra overall, sending Valentines like, “I do not personally know Elaine Kaplan but generally respect her work and her service to the LGBT community in her capacity in both the Clinton administration as well as this one.” That would be the same Elaine Kaplan who is responsible for Lambda Legal SUING the administration.

    I’m sure Eleveld, beyond the blandness she manifests in person, is sweet and well-intentioned. But she’s not a Girl Scout selling cookies on the corner. She’s paid to thoroughly secure and report on the facts at a time as determinative for the LGBT community’s chances for real progress as any in our history. If she had worked harder to be better informed, had been more willing to be critical of Obama, perhaps those chances wouldn’t be clearly stuck in a ditch.

  • I don’t know if this has been brought up already, but was this “let’s us gay bloggers stand in solidarity with Ken Mehlman” thing concocted during Netroots?

  • That’s one way to look at it.

    Here’s an equally sciency argument: Mehlman (and people like him) are sociopaths.

    Mehlman (et al) found a comfortable home and a successful career with people who wished to do harm to gays BECAUSE MEHLMAN HIMSELF ACTIVELY ENJOYED HURTING GAY PEOPLE.

    There is no other explanation.

    You cannot use the normal rules of human behavior on a sociopath, because by definition, they are not normal. Sociopaths don’t suddenly develop a moral compass and grow a conscience in their 40s.


    But you’re a big boy, Brian. So if you want to climb in Ken Mehlman’s windowless white van for the free candy and to help him find his puppy because your mom called and said it was okay, you’re certainly free to do so.

    We’d prefer that you stop and think.

  • So instead of crucifying Mehlman, let’s hand him a pickax and a shovel and let him get to work on dismantling the hate he and his cronies helped heap upon a vulnerable and undeserving minority. And who knows, maybe even President Obama and his advisers will get a whiff of the fact that spring is on its way.

    Yeah. And maybe monkeys will fly out of my ass.

  • “We wonder why our allies throw us under the bus when it suits them.”

    Very good point!

  • Gridlock

    I’ll direct my bile where I please, and what kind of hypocrite accuses me of pointing a finger at someone i apparently “have no clue about”, but himself defends this very same person despite having the exact same perspective as I do? You have no more clue about him than I. Your condescension rings hollow.

    Also, equally hilarious, is assuming that I do nothing to advance our rights. Like Mehlman, you have no clue about me or what I do and yet you sit here, castigating me, using the very same medium I’m using to castigate Mehlman for his OBSERVABLE and QUANTIFIABLE past actions and present lack of atonement. How about you take a big ol swallow of your own medicine: instead of bitching at me with the incredible display of logical fallacy you have demonstrated here, go out and fucking win our rights.

    Your argument is constructed of fail, decorated with hubris, and sold with a big fat sticker of hypocrisy.

  • Hitler was kind to family members, and Stalin loved children. There. They were human. Now that we’ve established that, let’s get real.

  • Sid

    Equinox nailed it. “It’s the same damn thing we say about Obama and his handling of the Republicans and the Tea Party. Grow a set and start slinging em around or let someone else who is willing to prove that they care enough to stand up for something, take your place.”

    Americablog and Eleveld are hypocrites and apologists for doing exactly the same thing they’ve railed against Obama for doing. As Equinox says, grow a set and stand up for something.

  • jwcisneros

    Don’t you dare play that card with me Gridlock. I am not some handwringer bent on accepting Mehlman without him doing the heavy lifting that he needs to do. But I am sick of the childish attitudes that are in full, puerile display here.

    Eleveld has done some good work for us, but the moment she comes out with an opinion that contradicts your world view? Traitor. That is intellectually dishonest.

    Hold Mehlman accountable. Demand his accountability but stop with the fucking friendly fire bullshit. I could give two shits what you think about me, so direct your bile elsewhere. I am just as bitterly aware what Mehlman did as you are.

    I choose to see if this guy continues to make amends for his horrendous past. You can sit here squalling like a baby with a poopy diaper, or you can move on and do something reasonably constructive like take a deep breath, calm the fuck down and actually go back to contributing to us winning our rights instead of pointing that judgmental finger at someone you have no clue about.

    Until you do that, you are no better than Mehlman.

    Good day, sir.

  • Brian

    We need to separate in our minds closet cases who are only now starting to come around to our side, from fundamentalist christian fucks, who deserve eternal scorn.

    The gay guys — the closet cases — may be suffering from the clinical psychological condition “cognitive dissonance” which makes them do sick things from the post-traumatic stress inflicted upon them as children, when they learned that being gay was the worst kind of man you could be.

    Those men seeking to move to our side — no matter what they have done — must still be appreciated as men who want to change and break from their past, and heal. We should greet them with the great force of accountability for their harmful actions, but also appreciate them for the changes in their lives that they are telling us they want to make.

    The closet gay man is not the same person as the fundamentalist bigot. One savors the joy from hate, and the other is trying to change — to escape self-hate, and to come over to our side. What kind of human beings are we if we do not try to talk to and accept — one of our own — who has been traumatized by a hateful society?

    Let’s embrace psychological science in this area, and not merely rely on severe moral judgment. Let’s just pause and think about Ken Mehlman, and all they other men — who may be moving our way.

    Let’s think of them as gay illegal immigrants. The want to come to us, but do we let them? Will we ask from them accountability, but give them a home with the acknowledgment that we all suffer from internal homophobia to some degree, and all have done some destructive and irrational actions due to this psychological condition.

    Stop. Think. There is some science to this question.

  • Gridlock

    Covering for unrepentant assholes like Mehlman is just as bad as BEING an unrepentant asshole like Mehlman.She does not earn automatic respect on every issue based on past opinions. Every issue is separate. I do not subscribe to her interpretation of what we should feel or do concerning Mehlman.

    Secondly, since when is expressing animosity towards a person who engaged in however many years of destructive action towards our community “living in anger”? It’s been all of 5 fucking days.

    Are we now not permitted by the handwringers on high to feel the slightest righteous rage towards those who spent decades fucking us over?

    To hell with that. We aren’t living in rage, we’re simply feeling it towards a scumbag who deserves every bit of it and who, so far, refuses to atone for his actions.

    You can welcome him with open arms, just take a shower afterwards so the rest of us don’t have to bear the stench of it.

  • jwcisneros

    I completely understand and identify with the fury here. Like everyone here of a certain age I remember the funerals, the hate, and every bitter, hateful comment thrown my way.

    But (you heard that but coming didn’t you?)…

    There is a painful reality that we must face. We cannot live on and be nourished by the bitter feelings, the resentment, and the rage at Ken Mehlman and people like him. It’s like eating angry candy, we grow to like the bitter taste and soon our souls are cadavorous, withered, and starved. Anger is a survival mechanism, meant to pull us through crisis, but you cannot live your life only eating it.

    Kerry Eleveld is right. It took a lot of guts for her to tell all of us her opinion, especially when most of us will be bitterly disappointed and angry at her for it. It’s tragic.

    The reality of this whole sordid affair is as follows:

    None of us are required to like, respect, or kowtow to Ken Mehlman. How you choose to feel about him is your personal business. I choose, despite my personal dislike of the guy, is to give him the chance to make amends to the community through doing good works for us. I have enough other closeted Republicans to dislike than a guy who will likely be consigned to the spiritual equivalent of mucking stalls until he proves his sincerity and effectiveness.

    Now, y’all can do whatever you like, but you might consider cutting Kerry some slack. She has the absolute right to feel the way she does and while folks here might disagree with her, they don’t have the right to call her names because they disagree with her. She has EARNED respect by her actions and I will not be part of a metaphoric witch hunt, she deserves better than the rage and bitterness that is usually turned on those who at least deserve it at some level.

  • Gridlock

    Oh screw that. Mehlman is due for some goddamned Karmic realignment and the only unfortunate part of that is it can only be portioned out by the cosmos, and not by us.

  • Gridlock

    There is no way in hell any future endeavors by Mehlman will have any kind of sincerity or authenticity till that shit for brains actually atones for all the horror he’s caused.

    Until he actually says “I fucked up big time, I created misery and injustice, I fostered so much abuse of our community, I’m deeply and terribly sorry” and takes responsibility for what pain he has wrought, I will not give him one fucking iota of credibility, respect, or even look at him with any decency.

    He’s a parasitic worm who’s shucking his past history and telling the rest of us “Look, just take me in cuz I’m one of you now. You have to.”

    fuck THAT, and fuck anybody who thinks we should.

  • Kmichael35

    As another poster on a previous thread had said : “The work ahead for Mehlman isn’t really that hard. He should just will his $3.75M condo to one of the many gay organizations he worked non-stop to destroy and then he can throw himself off his 17th floor Chelsea balcony.”

    Job done.

    I just hope he leaves his Rolodex out on the table so the folks at AFER can find it easily and send out their fund raising letters to Ken’s friends.

  • Dr. Brent Zenobia

    Agreed. The law of karma affects everyone, not just Mehlman. Be careful about wishing that the cosmos would inflict misfortune on others.

  • Joehio

    When Randy Shilts died, I said to my friends, “There goes the last true investigative reporter”. And the inability of the media to do its job over the last 10 years (especially during the build-up to the Iraq war) has proved me right. All we were left with was the Judith Millers, Jayson Blairs, Jeff Gannons and those things they have on Fox. Until now. Kerry Eleveld has been doing a fantastic job and she has restored a little hope in me that there are still intelligent, honest, hard-working people out there doing real journalism.

    If Kerry Eleveld thinks we need to focus on the future and quit recriminating for the past, I respect her enough that I think we ought to give that idea some consideration.

  • Brian

    The tide is turning for gay acceptance in America, and the gay community may be faced with an influx of immigrants.

    Many of the these “immigrants” may have done some very bad things to the gay community. Forget Mehlman for a minute, I am talking about people who are not pure wickedness, greed and badness — I am talking about gay people who were acting out of stress; psychologically, it is described as internalized homophobia resulting in “cognitive dissonance.” In other words, the hatred of their families, churches and communities have made them a little nutty — or a lot nutty.

    What does the gay community do? If they are “leaving the hetero-hate lifestyle,” and coming out, trying to heal, and maybe trying to help — what should the gay community do about these guys?

    What if there is a tidal wave of George Rekers, and LGBT’s of many stripes waking up after a long Rip Van Winkle tear? Maybe they have drinking problems, and all kinds of problems from internalized homophobia. What do we do? I wish the gay community would think about this, because it could be a huge public health issue.

  • fredndallas

    Possibly the important impact of Mehlman’s latest manipulation attempt is observing this astounding chorus of politico pros singing the “Tsk Tsk On Judgment, Stick To Forgiveness” hymn. Apparently their absorption in politics has created a chess move mindset that really distorts their notion of true Gay Life In America.

    I think we can thank Ken Mehlman for providing this unique lens through which we’re seeing a number of the most widely followed voices in gay media. It is amazingly revealing.

    Thankfully it is not universal. There are notable worthy exceptions.

    I didn’t think we had such a media professional class gay echo chamber. I thought our community’s major troubles were the Republicans, sucky HRC and all the elected Democratic politicians convinced they could get by with their “we’re not as bad” strategy.

    My eyes are opening.

  • equinox

    Don’t get me wrong I consider myself proudly liberal, but this brings whole new meaning to the phrase bleeding heart liberal. Yes, lets just put away our anger so that someone else can step up to the plate to take his place because they know that no matter how bad they make it for us, we will always take them in with open arms. We wonder why our allies throw us under the bus when it suits them. Adapt or become extinct people. This whole beaten puppy thing we do is going waaayy to far. People don’t respect feel good. They respect balls. We don’t have a problem flaunting them when we want something any other time, so why is this any different. We need to start drawing some lines in the sand or we will always be what they think we are; easy. I am so tried of forgiving people that I can no longer forgive myself for not saying “No, that’s enough you went too far.” Maybe we shoud not try to burn KM at the stake for teh sake of our humaity, but we should paint the big fat proverbial “A” on his chest to let people know that you can go too far. We aren’t going to take anymore steps backwards because you lack the courage to help move us forward. We need to have the courage to do it ourselves, and that starts with standing up to this BS and telling someone that they are not only wrong but they dare not show their face until they have cleaned up the mess they made. There’s a point when you have to realize that being nice is not going to get you anywhere. It’s the same damn thing we say about Obama and his handling of the Republicans and the Tea Party. Grow a set and start slinging em around or let someone else who is willing to prove that they care enough to stand up for something, take your place.

  • planesdrifter

    There you go Truckloadbear, you had to bring up the class thing, A-list didn’t you? Can’t we just all agree with our blog leaders and play nice here rather than making such mean spirited rebukes? I made the mistake 2 days ago of telling John A. that he was sounding more HRC in his attitude toward Mehlman and he responded by calling me an asshole 3 times, though once he referred to me only as a drive-by asshole which i guess isn’t quite as bad. Boy, oh boy did I learn my lesson. It hurts to be called names, because I’m a very sensitive sort that can easily be sullied by more reputable, scholarly, and dedicated advocates. No more critiquing in any way that might possibly be construed as flippant those insiders (or as you call them, A-list types), because I know I’m doomed to never ever gain entry to even the C-list now.

  • Rjsnsf

    I am shocked that after the ‘kick ass and take no prisoner’ attitude that Americablog takes on gay issues they would pander this KM pile of shit. Somewhere one of these tools suggested that now that KM has ‘come out’ and if the GOP rejects him and if we, his new BFFs reject him, where will go, what will he do? This BS offends me on more levels that I can count. Where can he go and what can he do: He can go to hell and he can go fuck himself. During his ‘struggle’ to come out, he caused untold pain and damage to the GLBT community. To suggest we must accept him and “use” his connections to further our cause is obscene. I’d say because of him, we are struggling the way we are. He needs a full and complete accountability of his past and start making amends. I don’t know how long or how deep he has to go but only seeing that will I even consider accepting him as one of us. Even now, we have all given him more consideration that he ever gave us. But then he was always too busy making millions and rubbing shoulders with the GOP trash/elite. And the damage he inflicted was the farthest thing from his mind………and now he wants to play on our team. I’m sure that vile friend called Rove could use a fuck buddy…..birds of a feather my friend!! You were an adult, you made informed decisions, you set your priorities. I don’t associate with people like you. Yes, that is judgemental but I’d prefer to call if survival. Survival in a discriminatory world for which we have you to thank! The End.

  • Brian

    BRAVO! Dehumanizing anyone brings us all down. I am all for accountability, but the things said about someone who has reached out to us, no matter what the circumstances, were unkind and beneath the speakers.

  • Dms106

    When Ken Mehlman accepts the pickax and a shovel through years of pickaxing and shoveling begins to dismantle the hate he and his cronies helped heap upon a vulnerable and undeserving minority, then I might change my mind. As it is, John and his forward thinking cohorts want to shower him with praise and award him great sums of money to do what he should spend the rest of his life doing pro bono, with a constantly available pickax and shovel.

  • Beautifully put, PeteWa.

    I might feel more forgiving towards Mehlman if he heartfully apologized for his part in the GOP’s anti-gay policies. He hasn’t — he’s given us excuses and has tried to claim (with no evidence to back it up) that he somehow blunted their anti same-sex marriage positions.

    I might feel more empathy if he admitted to having behaved like a self-hating gay. But he hasn’t.

    I might display more willingness to trust if his pro-gay record didn’t consist of a single fawning interview in The Atlantic and participation a single ‘Village-only’ fund-raiser, offset by decades of gay-baiting and using GLBTs as a cynical ‘wedge issue’.

    I might have more sympathy for the man if he provided any evidence whatsoever that he’s ever experienced a genuine committed same-sex romantic relationship. He spent his entire adult life closeted and we have no reason to believe he has any clue what it’s like to be denied the legal rights of marriage. For all we know, he’s only in it for the sex. It’s obvious he’s never experienced a long-term relationship.

    I might be willing to listen to Mehlman if his message to the gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgendered was something other than, “Vote Republican because the Islamic Jihad hates gays worse than we do.” This tells us a great deal about his character and integrity — or rather, utter lack thereof.

    This sick fuck still hasn’t stopped feeding from the poisonous well of hate and xenophobia.

    The only semi-positive emotion I have for him is abject pity — because this pathetic, middle-aged wannabe gay will soon learn just how fast his former ‘friends’ in the Republican party will disavow him, kick him out, accuse him of betraying the conservative GOP cause, paint him as a Democratic traitor mole, and turn him into an utter pariah.

    Maybe some fools on our side will give him a chance, and the benefit of the doubt, but not me. Let him make years of amends, and actually admit that what he himself did and has continued to do is wrong, then I’ll reconsider.

  • Sid

    But… but… but… he’s raising money for OUR side now! It’s okay that he still gives money to anti-gay candidates as long as he raises cold, heartless cash, right? We don’t need no stink’in ethics, morals, and honor – that’s for Glenn Beck and Palin and their ilk. Far be it for anyone outside the inner DC circle-jerk to question Americablog’s full sanction and support of Mehlman’s VERY personal (and private) self-discovery and coming out, right? It’s like statements from the DNC and HRC… we’re just supposed to listen to the “experts” that don’t know fresh shit from a frozen cow pie.

  • Truckloadbear

    This site, it’s owner and writers have been bitching for months that the DNC, President and both houses of Congress should get tough with the GOP thugs and their cronys. We’ve heard the rhetoric of “kick ’em in the balls” and “don’t play nice with the RNC cause theyll stab you in the back” and now we have Mehlman, handed to us on a silver platter, who should be made an object lesson in “Do not fuck with us 101”

    Are trying to tell me that Mehlman gets a pat on the back and encouragement to “do good” and a “well you did some bad things but thanks for not slitting our throats after you pushed us down the stairs”.


    PS anybody remember how “outraged” everybody was that a scientist with anti-lgbt opinions was gonna work on the BP oil spill and folks like me saying “take the help where we can get it” only to be called an appeaser? Where’d that steely resolve go? Oh, right…It’s different when you’re on the A-list.

  • Michael @ LeonardMatlovich.com

    EXACTLY. For once, “Kerry, Cub Reporter” is not alone in her halfwit perceptions of reality. At least 80% of the gay community and commentators are inexplicably only focusing on Kenny’s past, as if the meter stopped on his promotion of homohatred three years ago when he stopped being chair of the Repug Party. As you note, while he’s asking for money with one hand for marriage equality he’s giving money with the other hand to RABID opponents of not just marriage equality but also ENDA and an end to the ban on gays in the military. I’ll name just two: John McShame and Dan Coats who have been leaders for years in the fight against gay equality. WHY? We can only assume because the Right Wing beliefs he still shares with them is more important to him than their difference about marriage equality….just like Bush was and the other 2004/2006 Repug candidates that rode the coat tails of exploiting homohatred. Kenny and Kerry sittin’ in a tree….Jesus Fucking Christ of the Andes!

  • PeteWa

    this song could easily be dedicated to Ken and Kerry*

    Fuck You

    *only half-heartedly directed at Kerry as I do respect the advocacy you have done over the years, but seriously, wtf with this misdirected, unearned forgiveness…

  • PeteWa

    wow, Kerry, way to disappoint.explain to us, please, why we should forgive someone who feels no regret for his actions?the only thing that Kenny has stated that he regrets is that he wasn’t more comfortable with himself.he does not regret at all the strategy he employed working for Bush in 2004.you might remember that strategy, the one that pushed getting anti-same sex marriage enshrined in as many states as possible.the one that set gay rights back decades, the same one that incited misunderstanding, violence and hate against our own.he does not regret this.now, as if that isn’t bad enough, he has continued to spread hate since his “coming out” – turning his slithery eye of Sauron from the gays to the Muslims, at the same time he continues to spend his own money (and efforts) on those virulent homophobes running for office or reelection.and please, don’t insult our intelligence by pretending to believe that the ‘coming out’ of this very obvious quisling homosexual was a surprise to anyone, including Ken.or that the coming out of this Santorum stained Narcissus of privilege compares in any way to the coming out of the average gay person. there is no forgiveness where there has been no change.it is a fool who forgives the one who has stabbed you while that person continues to twist the knife.sorry, you can sell this bullshit to yourself, but I hope that you don’t expect the rest of us to come on board the we must not look at the past, but the future! snake oil train.it’s infuriating that you would employ the same odiferous rhetoric Obama has used for torturers to this current situation.

  • meg

    action speak louder than words. Time will tell wtf this guy and GOProud are worth their salt or just another ploy to swing our demographic.

    Republicans have been known to constantly stick to 2 things: dirty politics and money.

  • timncguy

    Kenny says he wants to help get marriage equality through the court system.But, Kenny has no desire to get marriage equality through the legislative process because he continues to support with time, money and votes the same old anti-gay republicans he has always supported.And, Kenny has made no statement at all about his position on ENDA, DADT, DOMA, UAFA.So, forgive me Ms Eleveld if I don’t believe that Kenny has even considered accepting a pick axe or shovel to begin any work as of yet.More likely he is coming on board after seeing the writing on the wall with the Prop 8 case in CA and newly out Kenny wants to be able to get married some day and would also like to join the community by jumping in on one of the top rungs w/o having earned a spot there.

    If Kenny wants to help with his money and his rolodex, fine take it from him. But, he should be doing it with no public recognition and no applause at all. And, he should be the one who demands that he receive none.

    The fact that we already have been made aware of his “good works” without any apology or recognition of his past works proves to me he is probably in it for the recognition.

  • Eric Payne

    Any gay organization which uses Mehlman in an attempt to raise money is not going to receive one single penny from me.

    I’m slowly coming to realize Mehlman’s entire coming-out was carefully orchestrated as a way to divide the “gay voting block,” and, ultimately, hinder our attempts in gaining marriage, and civil liberty, equality.

  • He often wondered why gay voters never formed common cause with Republican opponents of Islamic jihad, which he called “the greatest anti-gay force in the world right now.”

    (quote in Ken’s coming-out interview in The Atlantic)We’re supposed to forgive Ken and join him and the Republicans in (dare I say it) a “crusade” against the Muslims?Ken Mehlman has learned nothing about the poison of intolerance, bigotry and xenophobia. He’s only switched targets, and for what appears to be the most self-serving of reasons.Before we talk forgiveness and empathy and all that, I want to see him disavow hatred and bigotry against everyone, not just expressing mild regret that his party spent the last decade vilifying gays, lesbians, and the transgendered (and ignoring his own role in making that happen).

  • mykelb

    Mehlman should never be forgiven for setting gay rights back 20 years. His political strategy was at our expense and he needs to own it, wholly and fully. His half-hearted attempts will never be enough to make up for the damage he caused millions of people across America. I for one, will never forget it, and anything his name is associated with, will not get a dime from me.

  • alex02139

    Hmm. It’s like asking the people of Norway to accept Quisling as a patriot after he worked with the Nazis. Mehlman is clearly the worst sort of coward who turned his self-hatred into a cynically homopobic political campaign. Real people living in the Red states have been hurt by his actions, but Mehlman would ask us to forgive because he is “now comfortable with that part of my life.” Puke.

    History must record people like Ken Mehlman for the evil they represent.

  • randt503

    Mehlman can do whatever he likes. It’s a free country. Same thing for me. If people like him , or John A. or Eleveld need MY approval, or my embrace, then they have a lot more problems.

    I really don’t understand how bloggers and such are bending over backwards with the “I understand the anger, but gosh, Ken really really needs our support right now” meme that broke.

    He doesn’t need a damn thing from me, and I certainly have no mind to give him anything but the finger. Does that hurt his feelings? will that mean he packs up toys and goes home? If it does, it says a lot more about his tenous commitment to equality than anything I did.

    I am REALLY getting sick and tired of hearing about how I should move past Ken’s past. His past is not my problem. HIS job is to work on advancing our cause, not gauging whether my anger towards him is ebbing.

    If he actually works for our benefit, he should be doing it for the same reason we all do it — because it’s the right thing to do, and not because it makes you popular with gay journalists.

  • If only I were still a Christian I might beat myself up for “standing in judgment”. But Christians kicked the Christianity out of me. (Not that Christians don’t judge all the time.) As a result I now feel free to demand accountability from the likes of Mehlman. As for being “mired in yesterday’s despair,” I prefer to think of it as anger, thank you very much. And anger isn’t always a bad thing. Some times it’s quite the right thing. Let’s not help Mehlman beat ourselves up over judging him for what he is simply because he belatedly came out of the closet.

    After all Mehlman did to us, I REALLY don’t want to hear the gay community beating itself up over Mehlman!

  • Chad

    “…undeserving minority.”

    Out of curiosity, I’d like to know what a “deserving minority” is?

  • Popebuck1

    If Mehlman actually does grab a pick and shovel, I’ll be the first to congratulate him. But I’m not holding my breath.

  • ChitownKev

    Being that my homestate (MI) was one of those 21 states that adopted a anti-SSM amendment under Mehlman’s stewardship of the Bush campaign and the RNC, I would appreciate it if Ms. Eleveld not suggest that I’m being too judgmental.

    Besides I thought that the connected “A-list gays” had already given Mehlman the pick-ax and shovel; obviously I’m not in a position to do so, being the regular ‘mo that I am.

    I will be the judge of Mehlman’s progress for myself, thank you very much.

    In the meantime, maybe Eleveld and those of her ilk need to just drink a big steaming cup of shut the fuck up on the topic.

    Folks have asked that we “regular ‘mos” respect Mr. Mehlman’s “process.”

    And I do.

    Please respect ours.

  • Chad

    I do not want Ken Mehlman as a leader or spokesperson for the gay community. He is already advocating that gays should become Republicans because they are against Islam. Great, let’s become the “in” group by hating on others. He may be out of the closet, but his “soul” still has a lot of cleansing to do.

© 2017 AMERICAblog Media, LLC. All rights reserved. · Entries RSS