It takes a rabbi

It takes a Jewish Rabbi to get to the heart of the matter:

The facts are straightforward. Not even 10 percent of the American population is gay, but more than 50% of all marriages end in divorce. And this was happening years before gays came out in significant numbers, let alone demanded the right to marry. In fact, the only men who seem to still want to get married in America are gays. While they are petitioning the Supreme Court to tie the knot, the straight guys are breaking into a rash and running to the hills every time their live-in girlfriends of five years push for a ring on their finger.

The real cause of marital breakdown in our time is the redefinition of success to encompass only the professional and almost never the personal sphere. We Americans are an ambitious lot. We want to succeed in everything we do. What we fear most in this country is being a failure, a loser. But being a winner has come to mean having money, power and being famous.

In Hollywood, you can be on your fourth marriage and have all your kids in rehab. But so long as people are still paying 10 bucks to see your movies, you’re a success. On Wall Street, you can be a 30-something trader who takes the American taxpayer to the cleaners and pursues a life of endless womanizing, all fueled by gargantuan, government facilitated bonuses. But as long as you still drive a Ferrari and live in that $25 million Hampton estate, you’ll be invited to every cocktail party around.

It is also very telling that some of our biggest enemies, like Maggie Gallagher, for instance, transfer their own personal failings at the institution of marriage into attacks on the rights of LGBT people. It diminishes their responsibility for their failure by demanding we play the part of the scapegoat. Equal rights are there for us. We just need to continue the fight against our oppressors to claim them. I’m not sure I agree with every one of the good Rabbi’s conclusions, but he does lay out the real problems affecting straight marriages, and asks them to stop blaming the gays for their inability to hold together their families. That is a refreshingly nice step in the right direction.

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